Today is Day 13 of canvassing in New Hampshire. It was pouring, I got soaked. I got cold, I got lost, I kept going. Then I knocked on the doors of two apparently sane men who were “undecided.” I basically lost it. After saying my piece about doing what I am doing for my daughters and all daughters, and how Hillary has a good heart and a dedicated life of service, and of course she is not perfect, but who is, they were still saying “it’s really tough.” I had to walk.
In my car, I railed, “What is tough you freaking idiots.” How is this even a question? What happened to simple decency, respect for others, inclusion, experience and vision? I had just heard Stephen Colbert interviewed by Terry Gross, where he said that he had not been secretive about his feelings about the “flaming carcass shambling toward us. Don’t touch it, it’s rabid.”
As I drove back to the office I played Beyonce’s Lemonade album so loud the car shook. Channeling my nasty woman.
And then I looked at my emails where several people thanked me for what I was doing. Do not thank me. Get your behinds out there and do the work. I am not your surrogate, I am not doing this for you. You need to work too. I am so very sorry if you don’t think you “can do it.” Of course you can. Just get up and start. You can knock on a door, you can make a phone call, you can translate your despair and anxiety into action and JUST GET OUT THERE. If you think that this is not worth your discomfort, then you have some deep thinking to do.
I read this from Anne Lamott’s excellent Facebook timeline: “Jesus would have even loved horrible, mealy-mouth self-obsessed you, as if you were the only person on earth. But He would hope that you would perhaps pull yourself together just the tiniest, tiniest bit–maybe have a little something to eat, and a nap.”
So after I take my nap and have my grande flat white at Starbucks, I am going to GET OUT THERE AGAIN. Because the cost of inaction is far greater than the passing discomfort of falling into the occasional emotional pit.
JOIN ME. If you don’t know how, then respond to this post and I will connect you.